Awkward Pediatrican Visits: Mr. Evil-Thoughts

Today we had yet another epically awkward pediatrician appointment.

Let me begin by saying that our pediatrician is amazing. For over a decade she has been an honorary member of our family in the sense that she accepts our special brand of crazy and has yet to call Child Protective Services on us....a joke we frequently use with her, and that she still laughs at...Thank God.

I had made yesterday's appointment, the last one of the day, so that we could consult on where my sweet middle child, Piper, is in her journey with her various issues, and what our next step is.

Piper is my quintessential "middle child" that struggles with ADD and SPD and probably GAD and OCD...or in other words, she has major issues with the alphabet.

I made the appointment to determine what exactly our next step is in the process to help her. We just finished brain integration therapy and some weighted and sensory therapies, but the meltdowns haven't seemed to diminish, so, I have declared this summer my quest to find something, anything, that can help her essentially stay out of her own way.

The appointment lasted and hour and we now have some new steps with where to go, but there is nothing quite like going in to the doctor to discuss your child's a-typical behavior than having your eight year old crawl under the chairs and refuse to come out, and it sort of went downhill from there.

Me (pointing under the chairs): Like this. Is this normal?
Dr.: Typical
Me: It's Typical?
Dr.: No, we prefer the term typical.
Me: Oh, sorry. Is this typical?
Dr.: No, not really. So, Piper, whose your friend?
Piper: (holding up rubber, squeaky dog toy from under the chair) This is my friend.
Dr.: Does he have a name?
Me: Uh...yes. She just named him Octi today.
Piper: Yes, that's true. But his other name is Mr. Evil Thoughts. See *squeak squeak* I have had him for a long time.
Me: Yeeaaahhh. So, it isn't really like it sounds. That's just his name. He doesn't actually have evil thoughts or anything. I mean, she just named him that because it sounded more dramatic.
*long pause*
Dr: So, I am thinking we should start with some counseling first, before we check her for learning disabilities. Just to rule a few things out.
Me: *sigh*


Disclaimer: Named 5 years ago. Does not actually have evil thoughts. Really. I promise.